I can’t say I ever blatantly cheated and I know my parents would not have advocated that.

I have been cheated on and have had students who have cheated and I always have their back in public but as soon as we are alone we have a little talk!

Calling a ball out that was an inch in is just the start of something bigger in life. One inch becomes two inches, two inches becomes changing the score in your favor, and what happens on the court bleeds over into your daily life.

Do you cheat on tests? Do you lie to your parents? Will you cheat on your taxes as an adult? How do you want to be perceived in life and more importantly, how do you want to feel about yourself?

Doing the right thing, taking the harder road, doing something you don’t want to do, will almost always give you a positive outcome and one you can feel good about.

If you have any thoughts or personal experiences I would love to hear them!

I remember my first tournament as a little girl. I think I was 8 or 9 years old. I remember drawing the number 1 or 2 seed the first round. I was so nervous and knew I was going to lose.

My Dad took the approach that this girl whoever she was, was no better than me and that I was being silly for doubting myself. So I sucked it up and went out there about to throw up but ended up beating the little girl in straight sets.

I have no idea what I did or didn’t do. I just went out and hit the ball, which is exactly what my Dad wanted me to do. The minute you think about winning and losing you are taking your mind off the game. And for sure the minute you think you are going to lose that is exactly what will happen.

My tools to children now would be to give them a sense of confidence, a cocksureness, all athletes have to have that, but not a cocky-ness, there is a difference!

And to try to be still inside, to know that you have prepared as best to your ability for the match, and to trust yourself. Go out there, be smart, play hard, and give it 100%.

This is a very tricky question and topic.

I am who I am today because of the life lessons I was taught by my father through his pushing me in tennis. It is such a fine line of encouraging and pushing.

Look at some of the infamous tennis fathers and parents…Jennifer Capriati’s father, Steffi Graf’s father, the Williams sister’s father, Mary Pierce’s father…I can’t seem to think of any male tennis player’s crazy parents!! Why is that?? Wait, Bob and Mike Bryan have a very “active” father and I did read Agassi’s memoir.

You have to ask would Venus and Serena be who they are today and as good as they are if it weren’t for their father’s drive for them? I don’t know.

I do know that it is better to love, nurture, and make the sport fun for your child than making it a job. If there is true professional athlete potential in your child then make sure the coaches and experts that are surrounding you are coming from a positive healthy place.

There will be great sacrifices made to go down this path and someone needs to check in with the budding athlete to make sure they are okay and having fun and that should be the parents’ job.

This is not always easy and you most likely will not have just one coach over your athletic career.

When you are just starting out it is important to find a coach that is knowledgeable about your sport and one who is very nurturing. I am talking for ages 4-9. You want to establish a strong foundation with the basics of the sport, get the strokes and form down, and make sure your child is in a fun environment.

If they feel pressure to perform at this age, look for another coach. You can start taking more serious steps with their instruction once they have shown a greater interest and are a bit older.

I went to Nick Bollettieri’s tennis academy and lived there with the other kids when I was 11 years old. I think that was too young. I was already unhappy, feeling a lot of pressure that I didn’t know how to express. Your coach has to fit with your child’s personality and their interest level.

If you are keeping the communication open and really listening to your child through their words and actions, they will let you know how hard to push them and what coach is right for them. Like I have said before, there will be tons of sacrifices and hard work in becoming an elite athlete, but at the core, it has to be fun and something they want to do on their own.

If the coach you are working with does not have those fundamental values then search elsewhere.

I will be compiling a list of coaches I think would be worth checking out for all levels of athletes. Stay tuned.

There have been parents who have coached their children into great athletes but, from my observation, many of these relationships seem unhealthy.

You need to find the right coach that fits your child and then let them do their job.

You should be a positive support to your young athlete. Be the person that they can come to, to express their feelings and needs. Be there for them during their wins and their losses.

Ultimately, you are the most important person and role model in their lives. They look up to you and want your approval. You be the parent, let the coach be the coach!